June 5 Sermon: Making Room for God
Sermon, June 5, 2011
Holy Covenant UMC
Rev. Kate Hurst Floyd
Ephesians 4:25-5:2
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At my former church, where I served as an associate minister, we ate many, many meals together. It was a large church, so there were often several meals eaten together throughout the week—Wednesday lunch and dinner were offered weekly by the kitchen staff, we had staff gatherings and parties with senior adults, youth, once a month Sunday lunches, and more…we ate together a lot.
Different people prayed before our meals, laity and clergy, giving thanks to God for the people around the table, for the food and those who prepared it, praying a blessing on our time together and that our bodies and souls would be nourished. Standard grace protocol. But when the senior minister prayed, he always added this line at the end: And God, may our speech around the table be edifying and to your glory, so that what we say gives praise to you. Amen.
The first time I heard it I said a big “gulp” instead of “amen”. It’s one thing to give thanks to God for our food, it’s quite another for our whole meal time together to be reflective of God’s desire for our speech with one another. Especially because I was sitting next to a clergy colleague, and we were both hoping to gossip about another staff colleague who was giving us a really hard time. This simple prayer made me look inward and analyze what I really wanted to get out of our meal together. So we laughed nervously and had edifying speech during the meal, but I’ll confess to you that later that afternoon we conferred in her office and shared speech that wasn’t really glorifying anybody.
I got more and more used to the senior minister’s prayer, but something about it has stayed with me—that reminder that in all we do and say, God is sitting at the table with us. Listening, watching, ready to be in conversation with us. Are our conversations with one another worthy to be in the presence of God?
My speech, I’m afraid, especially around a meal with close friends, can just as easily turn to bitterness and slander as tender-hearted words that point to the grace of God (as if Perez Hilton is our dinner guest instead of God).
Paul tells us here in Ephesians, after this beautiful list of the ways we live in love and community with each other—building one another up, sharing grace and truth, even when it’s hard—that ultimately what it means to be a group of Christians is that we are imitators of God. Always and everywhere, in all that we do.
Jesus Christ, Paul! This is a tall order! I mean, we talk about being like Jesus Christ, trying to follow his example as Christians. But imitators of God…that takes things to a whole new level. Can we really be imitators of God? Especially when there are so many people out there to talk about? What does it mean to gather around tables as if God is there with us, our partner in conversation?
Ephesians gives us a whole list of ways we are to conduct ourselves as Christians, day in and day out, especially around the ways we treat one another in our Christian community. But we’d be short-sighted to look at this list and see it merely as another set of dos and don’ts that we struggle to follow. Rather, throughout this whole letter to the Ephesians, which we’ve been reading for over a month now, Paul’s ultimate focus is on the way our new life in Christ completely and utterly transforms us. And as a result of this transformation, we necessarily orient our thoughts, motives, actions, and speech towards what is good and holy and reflective of God’s love.
Now, we’re not going to be perfect—in fact, right here in this passage Paul admits there are still thieves as part of our community (insert any kind of sinning here). But in the midst of our temptations to sin, from stealing to slanderous speech, we’re called to turn around, center ourselves in our radical transformation through Christ, and live lives of love in all we do. We’ll fail, again and again, but because Christ has claimed us, we have the grace and the freedom to ask for forgiveness and do better next time.
And the picture here in Ephesians is not some idyllic scene of church members all holding hands and singing Kumbaya around a campfire; hardly. The point isn’t that we all need to be best friends or always agree or even really like each other. The point is that in all our human diversity and foibles, we do need to treat one another as if the image of God resides in us and in our neighbor. We’ll get angry, and we should—it’s a healthy reaction when we’ve been betrayed or witnessed injustice. We’ll get sad or frustrated. But our call is to say to someone who makes us angry: The way you addressed me was disrespectful, and I’m going to need some time and space away from you for a while. What we’re not called to do is let that anger fester, not be honest with our offender, and talk about that person behind his back, so that rumors spread.
We’re to share honest speech that builds up and points towards love.
I recently attended a meal that is significant in my life, our rehearsal dinner before our wedding. And there was the standard grace before the meal. We ate and talked and laughed and shared. And then it was time for the toasts, those infamous wedding toasts that are often filled with embarrassing stories or clichéd poems about love. And when Kyle’s dad opened the floor for people to speak, he began by reading this very verse from Ephesians 4. And he presented the toasts, not as an opportunity for anybody to say something to get a laugh, but as an opportunity for those gathered around us, close friends and family, to speak words of love and encouragement to us, to build us up in our relationship and our relationship with God.
And they did. I had never heard toasts framed this way before. Making room for God around our table, and in our interactions with each other. This doesn’t mean people were sentimental or unrealistic; on the contrary, people were honest about challenges and pain we’ve faced, the difficulty of spending your life loving another, what it means to merge families. But in the deep honesty we did feel encouraged and built up by the love around that place. (and there were a few embarrassing stories for good measure).
And this is what we’re called to do and be as Christian community—people who make room for God around our tables, in honest and loving speech. You do this so well here at Holy Covenant. I don’t need to tell you what this looks like, for you already live it: someone submits a prayer request online, and a whole team of people pray for peace, comfort and healing after a scary diagnosis; someone from the congregational care team sees the prayer need, and mobilizes a whole other group of people to provide meals for the family. You know somebody’s looking for a job, and so you ask around and send any leads their way; you don’t agree with someone in a committee meeting, but we set a space where disagreement can happen, honestly and openly, and we all pray together at the end of the meeting; you have the hard conversations with each other—letting someone know when you think they need to get out of a relationship or see a doctor or have an addiction problem—this kind of honesty only comes with intimacy and is born out of love.
What a privilege to be witness to this kind of building one another up over these two years. The strong sense of unconditional love you provide one another, I will never forget. I’m overwhelmed by the way you are family…in the best of times, in the worst of times…embodying the unconditional part of unconditional love. Paul would be proud—this is his vision for what a community of Christ followers looks like.
As we enter transition, with anxieties higher and much uncertain, interim roles will be falling to new people my prayer is that all of us remember that God is already with us. Our imperfect humanity might be more tempted to gossip or get angry or to slander one another. But this, this is the time to build one another up, and by doing so build the kingdom of God. To make some extra effort to pitch in with pastoral care, to have patience with one another, to speak truth in love. To be honest about our emotions, not to hide them and let them fester. If you’re upset about something, tell that person directly. This is the time to welcome Matt and Emily and Libby with open arms and hearts and speech pointing towards grace. Remember that God is our partner in all we do together. And because of this, we never have to carry the conversation alone.
Today, we’re eating a meal together, my last communion at Holy Covenant. We’ll say that ultimate grace, participating in the greatest meal ever shared. Filled up by the forgiveness and love of God’s son, our brother, Jesus Christ. As we share in his life, death, and resurrection—may we know that God meets us at this table. And as we leave this meal, may we be inspired in all that we do together, from one-on-one conversations to brunch to small groups, to set a place for God and build each other up as essential and beloved members of God’s family.
Thanks be to God. Amen.
Tags: Kate
